The First Time

Do you remember the first time you sinned? Probably not. You might have been two,  trying to get that Toy from another child. You did not like sharing, so you arrogantly screamed out, "MINE!". Do you remember that moment? Most of us won't. But, do you remember the first time you truly recognized that you sinned? That time that you told a very big lie to your parents, that time that you did something in secret that you knew was wrong?

We know that Adam and Even committed the first sin by choosing to disobey God. Disobedience cost them dearly, but how about the first murderer of the bible? Their son Cain? It did not seem at first that he was about to kill Abel. In fact, it seemed that he was just very jealous of his younger brother. But then one day he looses control, gets mad, and kills Abel. He becomes the first murderer recorded in history. Did Cain even know what he was doing? I don't think he had ever seen someone die yet. But He became the first to know how it looks like. Because He did it.

 Our culture is so used to sin that  I don't think we really grasp the concept of the first murder. They were brothers. They loved each other, and in one angry mood Cain committed what He probably didn't even know was possible YET. Does this make him innocent? Not at all because his actions were rooted in sin. However, God surprisingly showed him mercy. He said ^"anyone who kills Cain will suffer vengeance seven times over.” Then the Lord put a mark on Cain so that no one who found him would kill him."

 When sin entered the garden God knew that our passions and desires would be uncontrollable. God even gave Cain advice right before he killed his brother. He loved Cain so  much that he gave him  a tip: "sin is crouching at your door, its desire is for you, but you must rule over it!". Even when Cain failed, God had to give him his consequences but not without protecting him a the same time. Sin was new to this world and God was very involved.

As I was reading these chapters this week I couldn't help but think that I am very much like Cain. In one second I can let anger settle in. Bitterness overtakes my heart, and I allow Jealousy to whisper its thoughts over me. My heart recently has taken a few slides from doubts, to anger, to resentment. At first, I want to blame others and then realize that the one I'm fighting with, is really myself. Sin crouches at my door, its desire is for me. But I must rule over it. 





I am like Cain, knowing very well my sin, but needing the protection that can only come from God.

Oswald chamber says "beware of the cares of this world, because they are the things that produce a wrong temper of soul. It is extraordinary what an enormous power there is in simple things to distract our attention from God. Refuse to be swamped with the cares of this life. "

Is there any hope then? Yes. Yes there is. While we were yet sinners, he Loved us. So as long as God is your guide, He will be your protection. So as long as you live for Him He goes before you, He marks you, he tells your enemies that whoever tries to harm you will walk into His vengeance.

This is my hope, that sin will not rule over me.