I got a message the other day that stilled my heart. I have been pondering on these questions lately, "Have I made any impact, on anyone, since I graduated?" I am not going to lie to you and tell you I always read my bible and pray for people every single day. I don't. In fact, my readings and prayers have decreased tremendously. But before I allow condemnation to sink in I remember the Proverb, For an upright man, after falling seven times, will get up again.
I am not making any excuse for not keeping up with what I know I need to do. I have blatantly sinned and now I am confessing here on this blog. By no means am I also trying to push grace, for when I say that I will get back up again, I do it. I have no excuse for not talking to God daily. If I don't hear back from Him, it is most likely due to me.
Do you see what i'm talking about? I think we get so far away, slowly but surely, that we come to this point where our flesh tells us, "We don't need God". Have I ever thought this out loud? Never. I will never sit in front of you and think "I don't need God". But I certainly act like it. How? By not communicating with Him. How can you receive gifts constantly from someone that you don't know without asking them, "Who are you and why do you send me these gifts?". There must be communication in order to sort things out. To find out who the sender is, you must first investigate.
I feel this way with God. He keeps blessing me, and sending me gifts and tries to talk to me but It's like He's hitting a wall. I don't even flinch anymore when I receive new blessings. I somehow, expect them. Why? Because He's good. He makes his rain shine on the Just and Unjust.
Just when you're completely living life on your own He sends you one last gift. It's to actually see if you're awake and not completely ignoring Him. If you've ever seen the Grinch who stole Christmas you'll undersand what i'm talking about. Right at the end, when his heart starts beating, he lets out a cry and says "HELP ME, I'm FEELING!". This is how I feel when I get these last warnings. Right about when I'm slipping away, he sends me one last gift; they come in all different shapes and sizes. This last time he sent me a gift through a facebook message. I like to call these "reminders".
So a friend of mine sends me a message asking me what the title of this specific song was. A song that I had burned into a CD to give to her so she could listen. She told me she had been looking for the lyrics all over google but could not find the musician. It was killing her and if I could please help. She couldn't look up any other lyrics because she had passed it on to someone else.
The Lyrics are as follows:
You move the earth you move the mountains, the sky, the sea to save me, to save me.
I received a text from my sister a few days ago that had a picture of Trident Tropical gum. She tells me in her text, "So and so says that every time she sees this it reminds her of you". I smiled then, thinking to myself, how funny. Even the little things that one does, like the simple flavor of a specific gum can impact a person's life.
And I think this was my reminder. I gave this CD with the hopes that someone would listen to it and someone did. And now someone I don't know has it because it has been passed on. When I was a teenager I used to chew Trident Tropical gum very often, and now someone sees it and thinks of me.
Do you know where I'm getting at?
I hope you do.
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